Joy in Suffering (mini) Book Club — Day 4: The Paradox: Joy in Suffering

We continue our 9-day book club, reading the book Joy in Suffering.

📖 Day 4: The Paradox: Joy in Suffering 🌹

If you don’t already have the book, you can find the readings online for free here:

🔗 https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Joy_in_Suffering/Fourth_Day

What was your favorite quote or takeaway from today’s reading? Share in the comments below!

MY TAKEAWAYS

Today’s reading was very helpful for making the point that St. Therese struggled just like the rest of us. She was not immune to feelings of aversion, annoyance, personal preferences, etc. She had to work at it, and over time, with practice, it got easier for her. I really liked the quote that emphasized that when her “anguish was at its height,” she would “repeat the more earnestly to the good God and the saints that I love them, believe me, it is in spite of what I feel at the first moment.”

That key phrase, “in spite of what I feel” shows that it is an act of the will rather than some warm and fuzzy feelings of joy. This reminds me also of how it is with forgiveness, it being an act of the will. We can still feel hurt, yet with our will, we can forgive. Many times we may have to do it over and over again, despite the feelings, but it gets easier!

It also took St. Therese a lot of effort and many repeated attempts to reach these heights of heroic virtue, but as with any good habit, practice makes perfect. She described, "At first my looks betrayed my effort; but little by little self-sacrifice seemed to come more easily without hesitation.” She went on, “At first I did not always succeed, but now it is a habit which I am happy to have acquired.”

It was also really helpful to know that at the beginning of St. Therese’s religious life she "had to console herself with the thought that all would be known on the day of judgment.” I think we can also find a lot of encouragement and consolation in this thought, knowing that each and every one of our little sacrifices and sufferings borne with love for God and souls are known and seen by God.

Another great point from this chapter is that “the very refinement of all joy” is that of being a “joy we do not feel!” This joy "is rather peace, for he who says peace does not say joy, or at least sensible joy: to suffer in peace it is enough to will heartily all that our Lord wills.” That is, we are satisfied and at peace knowing that we are doing God’s will.

And as the novena prayer beautifully says:

May that which pleases God always be pleasing to me…Above all, I desire to thank Him at all times for the crosses and sufferings He sends me knowing that one "Thanks be to God" in trials is worth a thousand in things according to our will...St. Paul bids us "give thanks in ALL things”

St. Therese, pray for me, that these words may sink deep into my soul and that I may truly give thanks and rejoice in ALL things, that thus my joy, like yours, may attain to the heroic, the very refinement of all joy, a joy pure and wholly unselfish.

To end, this all ties in so well to what St. Alphonsus talks about in his book Uniformity with God’s Will. I think it would be such a great book to do a book club with next, if you all are up for it!

📝I look forward to hearing your main takeaway and/or favorite quote from today! Thanks for joining me! 💕

💗My favorite quotes from today:

🌹(1) Not Insensible:

• She confessed that, "It costs dearly to give Jesus what He asks," and that, "if on these occasions," i.e., when her anguish is at its height, "I repeat the more earnestly to the good God and the saints that I love them, believe me, it is in spite of what I feel at the first moment."

• She was just like us (examples of her own suffering/self-denial): 1) having to hurry past her sister Pauiline’s cell becasue she so badly wanted to talk to her 2) the effort to refrain from giving a stern look to a Sister that was fidgeting with her rosary was so intense that it cause her” to be bathed in perspiration” 3) when splashed with dirty laundry water her first impulse was to show her displeasure 4) when she was falsely blamed for making a noise she was “ burning to defend herself” and had to run away to keep from doing so 5) She had a fearful aversion to a certain Sister 6) “she had to hold herself with both hands to keep from yielding to impatience” one time when she found her things left disordered

• St. Therese, then, was very sensitive to pain; her smile cost her much…In fact, in the beginning of her religious life she "had to console herself with the thought that all would be known on the day of judgment."

• Later she admitted: "At first my looks betrayed my effort; but little by little self-sacrifice seemed to come more easily without hesitation…. When I suffered much, … instead of a melancholy look I now answered by a smile.

• “At first I did not always succeed, but now it is a habit which I am happy to have acquired."

• "I have always forced myself to love suffering and to give it a glad welcome."

• "He that is faithful in little things, is faithful in that which is greater," for "in this path it is only the first step that is hard; yet God never refuses the first grace—courage for self-conquest

• "It is such a joy to think that for each little pain cheerfully borne we shall love the good God more for all eternity."

🌹(2) Genuine Joy:

• she often repeated: "Jesus loves the joyous heart, He loves the ever-smiling soul."

• "To suffer and to love is the purest of all joys,"

• "Don't be so sad about me; I have reached the point of not being able to suffer any more, because all suffering is sweet to me."

• Nothing gives me such 'little joys' as 'little crosses.' I know of no ecstasy to which I do not prefer sacrifice. There I find my happiness, and there alone…. When we expect nothing but suffering, then the least joy is a surprise, and later the suffering itself becomes the greatest of all joys, when we seek it as a precious treasure."

• When Heaven refused her relief, she "thanked God and the saints just the same," and she "paid our Lord all sorts of compliments when He disappointed her."

• "I hasten to say to the good God: 'My God, I know that I have deserved this feeling of sadness (for my fault), yet, allow me to look upon it as a trial which Thy love sends me. I regret my sin; but I am glad to have this little suffering to offer Thee."

• St. Augustine said: "When one loves, one does not suffer, or if one does, the very suffering is loved."

• Her clear and living faith gave her a very deep insight into the immense value of suffering and made her esteem it as the most precious of all treasures for God's glory, the salvation of souls, and her own eternal bliss.

🌹(3) Refined Joy:

• …there must be no misunderstanding—it was not sensible (felt) joy…The joy of which she spoke is quite different: "Here I find but one joy, that of suffering, and this joy, which is not one of sense, is above all joy."

• This joy "is rather peace, for he who says peace does not say joy, or at least sensible joy: to suffer in peace it is enough to will heartily all that our Lord wills."

• "There are people who make the worst of everything. As for me, I do just the contrary. I always see the good side of things, and even if my portion be suffering without a glimmer of solace, well, I make it my joy."

• Truly this is the very refinement of all joy—joy we do not feel!"

🌹Favorite quotes from the Novena Prayer:

• May that which pleases God always be pleasing to me.

• Above all, I desire to thank Him at all times for the crosses and sufferings He sends me knowing that one "Thanks be to God" in trials is worth a thousand in things according to our will.

• St. Paul bids us to "give thanks in ALL things"

• O St. Therese, pray for me, that these words may sink deep into my soul and that I may truly give thanks and rejoice in ALL things, that thus my joy, like yours, may attain to the heroic, the very refinement of all joy, a joy pure and wholly unselfish.

Reflection Questions & Action Items

4.1 Not Insensible

Reflection Questions

1. Does it comfort me to know that Thérèse was not born "perfect"? That she felt the sting of aversion, the burn of injustice, and was "bathed in perspiration" from the effort?

2. I often think "I can't do this" because I feel anger, or impatience, or aversion. Thérèse also felt these things. Her "joy" was not a feeling but a choice ("I forced myself”). Am I willing to make that choice? Am I willing to "act with courage" in the "onset" of the trial, even if my "looks betray" the effort?

   
   

Action Items

1. The next time today you feel a strong, negative emotion (impatience, anger, aversion, the "burn" to defend yourself), do not be discouraged.

2. Try and force the "glad welcome" by an act of will: offer a smile, keep silent, or say a kind word. That is the victory.

4.2 Genuine Joy

Reflection Questions

1. I usually let my faults discourage me and stop me. Thérèse sees them as more material to "offer Thee.” How can I start to practice this? Can I offer my humiliation after a failure, or my sadness over a sin, as a "little suffering" to God?

Action Items

1. Practice "heavenly prudence" today.

2. The next time you commit a fault (snap at someone, make a mistake), do two things:

1. First, ask for forgiveness (from God and the person).

1. Second, immediately offer the "feeling of sadness" or "humiliation" to Jesus as a "little suffering," saying, "I regret my sin; but I am glad to have this humiliation to offer Thee."

4.3 Refined Joy

Reflection Questions

1. This is the most important distinction in the book. Have I been "seeking my own consolation" by expecting to feel good about my suffering?

2. Can I accept a "joy" that I "do not feel"? A "joy" that is "rather peace”?

3. The true joy is the peace that comes from aligning my will with God's will. My senses can be in agony (like Jesus in the garden) while my will is in perfect peace ("Not my will, but Thine, be done"). Am I willing to aim for this "refined joy"?

   
   

Action Items

1. The next time you are in pain and do not feel "joyful" (because you are not “insensible") do not be discouraged. Instead, repeat this line "To suffer in peace it is enough to will heartily all that our Lord wills” and find "peace" (refined joy) in willing the suffering, rather than "joy" (sensible joy) in feeling it.